The Power of Pleasure with Ella Hall

Ella Hall believes that we have 4 unique bodies and in order to accelerate anything, all 4 of these have to be in alignment to be able to move forward with more ease and grace.  The first of these is the physical body, then the mind body, then our emotional body, and the spiritual/energetic body.  She supports people get all 4 of these in alignment with each other to remove all blocks.

Ella had been trying to heal herself for her whole life.  She felt that her feminine self wasn't safe, so she shut it down.  She operated in the linear, goal-focused masculine energy and turned to the usual addictions to numb her roiling emotions.  That imbalance became body dysmorphia and eating disorders.  

Eventually she found Tantra and the practice awakened and balanced all her energies so that she's able to bring the abundance, health, and wealth that she desires and she's falling more in love with herself all the time.

Join Ella's Facebook community for women: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theplatinumwoman/

Connect with Magic:

A Magical Life Podcast on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amagicallifepodcast/

On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wholisticnaturalhealth/

Online: https://wholisticnaturalhealth.com.au

A Subito Media production

Transcript

Magic Barclay: 1:00

Welcome back to a magical life. I'm your host magic Barclay. And today I'm joined by Ella Hall, who is a leading transformation, success coach and pleasure, power expert. She's made it her life mission to heal and fall in love with herself so that she can help others do the same. She supports busy heart-centered men and women to bridge the gap between head and heart, success and sexuality. She's most recently founded a movement for women, and has launched a free Facebook group called the platinum woman, know your value, live your worth. And I am actually a member of that. So happy to be there. She's educating, inspiring and empowering a community of women to live extraordinary, healthy, free, and abundant lives from the bedroom to the boardroom and beyond. Welcome Ella. Thanks for joining me.

Ella Hall: 1:54

Thanks magic. It's a pleasure to be here.

Magic Barclay: 1:57

It's our pleasure. And thank you for sharing everything you have in that Facebook group. I'm absolutely loving it.

Ella Hall: 2:04

Mm I'm so happy that you're there. Thank you for sharing your light. Um, with the space and the community.

Magic Barclay: 2:11

Ella. We've got so much to cover here. So I'm just going to jump straight in. What can your expertise do to accelerate health? Now, when we're talking health, we talk emotional, spiritual, and physical.

Ella Hall: 2:23

Yeah. Beautiful question. So what I believe is that we actually have four unique bodies. And in order to accelerate anything, all four of these bodies have to be on the same page. They have to be on board with getting us to where we want to go and basically receiving and inviting in and allowing in what we deeply desire what we want. So these bodies are our physical body and every cell in our body is its own universe. It has its own memory. Yeah, its own technology, its own information. We have our mind and that's the beautiful software. And so often we give too much power to the mind as a master and as, instead of using it as it is beautifully designed for, which is to be our servant. And then we have our emotional body. Um, and then we also have a spiritual, energetic body, if you will. And all of these bodies. Have to, as I said, be in alignment to really start to move forward with more ease and grace to align us to what we deeply want and what wants us back ultimately. So whether that's health, freedom, pleasure, power, abundance, whatever it is, we can have it, but we've got to not be at war with ourselves. We've got to have little to no resistance in the way. And that's my mastery. I support people to get all these bodies into alignment with each other so that they can actually call in, become and manifest all they deeply desire in their pleasure.

Magic Barclay: 3:55

That is absolutely beautiful. Thank you for that. Now you talk about taking people into every area of their life, from the bedroom to the boardroom and beyond. Can you explain that?

Ella Hall: 4:09

Sure. Um, look, I teach my own medicine, so everything I have ever done my entire life has been in order to heal and fall more deeply in love with myself. Just if we can go into a little bit of my own story, you know, I grew up. In a family where my mom is an incredible psychologist and sex therapist. So I've said to people, I was in therapy in utero. Um, so that was kind of my upbringing. I was surrounded with psychology books. I had access to a really liberated pathway and that's kind of what put me on to my own trajectory of loving personal development and, you know, neurology. Education. I'm a curious Explorer, right? And I'm hungry to learn. I'm always a student of life. Yeah. I'm learning all the time. So throughout my own journey, you know, I grew up in that world of having all of this freedom and permission and you know, this, this willingness to have an open platform to talk about things like sexuality and pleasure and things that other did people just didn't have, but that didn't mean that I was immune from experiencing things like ultimate body shame. I grew up with body dysmorphia. Um, I had an eating disorder from a very early age. I was, um, sexually assaulted. Many times I was a really fast bloomer. And so I'm survivor, right? That

5:41

taught

Ella Hall: 5:42

me, I am a survivor. And, you know, I went down the, uh, channel of being an empath. I was, I grew up a deep feeler, so I felt everything and everyone, and in a way it's a blessing in another way, if you don't know how to channel that, it can be a real curse. So I spent the majority of my early years trying to numb that feeling. So whether I used people, places, things, sex, drugs, rock, and roll. It didn't matter. Food was my first drug of choice. And that's what I learned. Right. I learned how to numb. I learned how to be professional addict at the same time while all of that was going on, on the others side of the spectrum because we leave on a planet of dualities hot, cold left, right? Good, bad. I was a total addict in a really destructive and detrimental way, but I was also a total will addict in a, I know I'm here for a purpose. I'm here to learn. I want to break through this. I know I've got something important to give. I've got this message to share. I just didn't know how to get that magic within me out of me. And that's what really identified was burning me up from within. Because our life force energy that each one of us is burst with. We are burst as star dust and mud, mother earth, father sun. We come from this cosmic creation energy and that when we can tap into that, Like absolute portal of power and channel it healthfully and productively, like the sun, we can birth worlds. And I just didn't have that outlet. I was good at so many things, but you know, that almost overwhelmed me as well. Overwhelm was kind of like a state of being for me for many, many years. Anxiety and depression came from that and there were heaps of unhealthy coping strategies I used. So throughout my journey, I tried every modality known to man. I saw so many psychologists, psychiatrists. I was on antidepressants for 15 years. You know, there were all of these things that were trying to help me manage and I've got bunny rabbit ears going on with my hands here, manage this incredible creation energy that just didn't have a proper outlet. And then throughout the years, as I started to get more and more in alignment, and again, there's that word again, alignment, um, with my passions and my purpose, and, you know, start to really explore some of my gifts in a really creative and positive way. Everything started to shift. And that kept leading me to another door, which when I'd opened that more amazing gifts would come online. You know, more challenges would, would confront me, more areas of opportunity to grow and expand my comfort zone kept coming into my orbit in my field. So I managed a martial arts academy for, from 2007 for six years. And I grew the place by 400%. So I was loving it, Magic. I was helping people transform their outsides. By this stage, I'd kind of put the drugs down and I was, you know, on path on purpose. That felt really good. I was still just a busy woman, this busy heart-centered woman. So I was driven by my head trying to live in the masculine paradigm of being everything to everyone. I was a people-pleaser, overachiever, perfectionist. I never could just relax ever. And so I was using still food and other things. I got down to 50 kilos at one point, it was really unhealthy for me and I knew it wasn't sustainable. So I was like, okay, after growing the place by 400% over six years, I've kind of grown to the capacity. I couldn't earn any more money there, I'd hit my cap. I didn't feel like I was growing. I just felt like I was existing. And from there I started getting headhunted into other areas of the health and wellness industry and I was helping people grow their businesses. So the two things that turned me on most, uh, business and energy, right. The linear and the more kind of expansive if you will, masculine and feminine. And, um, yeah. So as I started to leave that identity, Right, which was, I was like the manager of this martial arts academy. I was this, you know, big fish in a small pond. And all of a sudden I went and completely left there and I threw myself into what scared me the most. And that was embracing my own feminine. I had to learn about like sacred sexuality as a means to unlock that life force energy, and start to channel it beautifully. And what I did when I discovered tantra, I realized like unbeknownst to me, it was the gateway. It was the tool. It was the biohack technology that brought all my bodies that were previously very out of alignment or fighting each other into alignment, beautifully fast healthily, ecologically. And I started to move through years of trauma and things that have been previously holding me back with more ease and more grace. And I was in my pleasure. I refound and reclaimed my voice, my sensuality, my feminine. I started to have a deeper connection to my body. I knew how to protect my energetic field more. And I did it all from a space of feeling whole and integrated. And to me, the word integration means to realize and fall in love with one's unrealized parts. So we bring all parts of us home, the light and the shadow. And when we are a whole being, we take us from the bedroom to the boardroom and beyond. Tantra what didn't just help me in the bedroom and trust me, it really did. Right, but it really helped me in every area of life to then be and bring my full presence, my full radiance, my full expression, both my feminine and masculine attributes, and really start to positively and productively impact every single area of my life and that's all I want to help other beautiful, busy heart-centered people do is get out of their head, come back time to their heart and their sex wisdom and, um, be in their pleasure, be in their power.

Magic Barclay: 11:56

Wow. Just listening to you. I'm sitting here. Thank goodness. The listeners can't see me, I'm nodding away. It's like our lives have gone along a very similar path and. Yes, I'm an addict for me. It was food early on. It was promiscuity. It was the, the rock and roll lifestyle as well. Alcohol, not eating like, and I've talked about this in previous podcasts, having body dysmorphic disorder previously, before that anorexia, you know, it's just so intertwined. And you think that's who you are, that addict that's always seeking pain or pleasure, but there's actually a mix of both, just as there's a mix of masculine and feminine. And it seems from your story that you were running away from the feminine to embrace the masculine. Till you realize there was that balance and I'm sitting here nodding, going. I did the same thing. I was extremely empathetic and feminine. And then I decided to open a gym and do weight lifting with the meatheads that worked for me. And they were roiding out of control, and I was trying to naturally out lift them as a middle aged woman and mum of two. And I was really in my masculine then and then really saying that I had to balance both. So listeners, you couldn't see me nodding, but I was like one of those bobbleheads on someone's dash cam thing. Just before, as Ella was talking. Ella, there's a lot that we talk about here with wealth. And when we talk wealth, we're talking wealth of soul, wealth of purpose, not just the financial wealth that people think the whole encompassing synopsis of wealth is, but the wealth of spirituality and of energy. What can embracing your sexuality and embracing the balance of masculine and feminine? What can that do for wealth?

Ella Hall: 14:09

Wow. Beautiful questions. So you're exactly right. Um, I did, for many, many years shut my feminine down because I didn't consider her safe. I thought that feminine energy was weak. I thought that she liked pink. I thought it was annoying and frivolous. And I'd learned from my mom who was an incredibly smart, smart, wise woman. How to just get. You know, stuff done and push through and hustle. And you know, if I wanted to see my mum, when I was younger, I had to make an appointment. Um, you know, it was that kind of thing. Cause she was always working. And so that instilled in me, the values of like have to keep working, have to push, have to succeed, have to be the best at this. But also I never felt like I measured up because I was a deep creative and I had different kinds of skills and attributes and magic to offer. So, um, when it came to. Learning about these two energies and the abundance that comes when you can actually, as, especially as a woman magic. I know that a lot of your listeners are women. Okay. And when I actually learned about sacred sexuality and how to tap back in to that feminine power. The true feminine power, not my warped perception of what feminine power was, but like, if we look at the world that we live in, it we've grown up as women in a very masculine dominated paradigm, right? Where everything has been based on women fitting in to a male structure of power. So us women have learned how to fit in with that. Okay? Which means that very often we are trying to achieve things, to create and manifest abundance on every level. But we're using that linear masculine paradigm to do it. And what I've deeply learned now, after working on myself for, you know, I've just turned 40, happy birthday to me woohoo, like fine wine, getting better with age. Um, but also after working with hundreds and hundreds of other women, Helping them unlock their own feminine energy through the wisdom of the heart, the womb and our sex center that when a woman touches base with her feminine power and can start to co-create from that place of deep connection to her, as well as use that beautiful masculine energy, rather than call it balancing the masculine and feminine. Because even that, when you're a busy heart centered man or woman and we talk about balance that still tells me that I've got to work and my body's moving kinda side to side right now. It's like, oh, are they balanced? How do I, how do I balance this? You know what I mean? Whereas if we talk about it in, how do I harmonize these two energies? Now my hands are kind of moving like snakes, um, and rivers, you know, meeting each other. It's like, sometimes your masculine energy will be, you know, stronger because you need to get things done, like, um, to use. Catherine's image. She teaches feminine power. She says, you know, um, if we need to build a house, we need a structure, it has to be linear, there's steps by step process. And then at the end of it, we're going to have a really solid house. Feminine power is not like that. It's very different. It's a different energy. So feminine is more like working with the power of nature. Nature doesn't need a structure. You don't give a flower structure to grow. You give it the right environment, the space, the energy, the water, the sunlight, and organically a chain reaction happens, and your flower will bloom and blossom on its own. And that's the difference. When we can start to tap into that power and tantra and through a woman's own pleasure and, you know, intention, breath, sound, and movement, which are the four core principles of tantra, which I bring into everything I do, literally every area of life. I'm like, what's my intention here. Am I breathing? Am I moving? Am I sounding, am I in my pleasure? You know, is there something in my body that doesn't feel good? Okay, let me address that, right? And all of a sudden, when I'm in that space, I'm working with, by feminine energy, the abundance that is able to be attracted. Almost effortlessly, um, on every level. So we're talking spiritual abundance, I'm going to feel more connected and tapped in and tuned in and turned on by source energy. I'm going to feel more aligned to go and do the action steps, the inspired action steps that are going to call to me and bring to me the physical abundance, right? That is already in my field. It's my birthright to have it, right? It's just my own conditioning and my own mind that will get in the way and tell me I'm not worthy. I'm not deserving. This is where we have to go and find what are the blockages? Where do they live? Are they in my cells? Is it conditioning that came through? My genetic programming is a conditioning that I learned when I was like zero to seven. Where is it living in my body? You know, is it in my emotional body? Is it in my energetic field? You know, is it just around reconditioning, reprogramming my mind for success? Like these are the things that I start to work with and help people align to and using these two opposing yet so complimentary energies within them because of that, all of it. Again, it's holistic it's integration. So when we're not busy telling ourselves. This part of me is worthy and deserving. This part is good. And that part of me, that's the, that's the bad part. That's the part that's not worthy. That's the part that's ugly and unlovable. And all of a sudden I'm trying to push that part of me away. And of course, I'm going to feel separate from self I'm going to feel lonely and abandoned because I'm abandoning myself. And this is what I say to anyone that comes to work with me. Like I work with a lot of couples too. Teaching them pleasure power and how to tap into this pleasure as a means to be like an attraction factor to and for abundance, I say to them, the first thing that we need to do is come back into our sovereignty. You are not your relationship. You bring all of you into it, right? So that that's the power, that's the power of working with these two energies. Oh. And by the way, there is a true thing called orgasmic manifesting. I used to teach a, um, a course called manifesting mofos and it was for women. And, uh, yeah, we'd go through the seven pillars of powerful manifesting and orgasmic manifesting is a real thing. When you are in your pleasure and you have a clear intention and your heart is open and all your cells are on board and they're vibrating with this incredible life force energy, and we're shooting rockets of desire out to the universe and we're breathing, and we're calling things in, in our pleasure, that is when our manifesting abilities are amplified, like a thousand percent, right? I've manifested some really incredible things. I manifested my partner that way. I manifested$10,000 in my bank account within 24 hours that way after being really stuck and blocked for a really long time, I just went and practiced an orgasmic manifesting session. And literally within 24 hours, everything was back in flow. So yeah, you get fed on every level.

Magic Barclay: 21:34

That is amazing to hear. Now Ella, there's another thing that we like to talk about here. And that's weight. People often, especially women often battle their weight, quite needlessly. And I myself have been everything from 47 kilos to 144 kilos now sitting at 70. And that journey has certainly not been at all linear. So I like to give people some information on weight. With functional health solutions, which my practice do, we look at weight as merely symptom. It could be a symptom of unhappiness, could be a symptom of inflammation or ill health, something going on in the background, still pathogens chronic disease, or it just could be a disconnection with self, or it could be an amalgamation of all of those things, but whatever it is, it's a symptom. So my question is, if you've ever battled your weight, what was your trigger to lose it? And what can you offer the listeners to reduce their stress? We know that stress on all levels is a key issue in weight problems.

Ella Hall: 22:53

Yeah. Hundred percent. And I have lived that battle, right? And again, I'm doing bunny rabbit ears with my hands here, but the way that I can, um, Come into full harmony within myself is to look back at everything that's ever happened in my life. Every struggle or perceived struggle that I've ever had with my weight or with food or with my body, it's all been a gift. I call it my hero's journey. Right. And it's like, what have I learned? Because that's your conditioning, what you learn. So from a very early age, I learned that my body didn't feel safe to me. It didn't even feel like it belonged to me. And I learned how to use food as a way to numb and, you know, stimulate myself, you know, sugar was like my number one drug from the age of like three, I was stealing food then, you know, to kind of manage my emotions and how I felt. And then as I grew, um, I put on a lot of weight. Like we didn't have any education around food. God bless my parents. They did the best they could with what they had. But, you know, my mom had her own conditioning that was passed on from her mom. So she was on a diet from the age of 12. So I grew up with a mum like modeling a mum who was always on a diet who was always working her way of loving us, was to make sure my brother and I he's younger two years was to make sure that the pantry was always stocked. So I'd come home from school and my emotional needs were never met in the way that I, you know, this little girl, I just want to show you what I've done. Like I, you know, I, I just wanted your validation. I wanted your love. I want to just say you're proud of me. And instead you'd never picked me up from school and you're a working mom and, but the food was there. The food was always there. And I would eat like a week's worth of food in a sitting in a night, right? I even sold my brother, my soul for a paddle pop, he still reminds me about that to this day. Don't worry. He's given it back. Um, so, you know, As I grew. And then I went through puberty. I felt like my body completely betrayed me. So now I have these massive breasts from like the age of 10, suddenly my body's not a safe place to be, people in my world that were once safe were not. And that meant men and women because everybody had a comment about my breasts. Like I just wanted the world to swallow me whole and I wanted to just disappear and there was nowhere I could go. And I had really bad acne, like my hormones have been something that I've really journeyed with through this. And again, that made me dislike my feminine. If I wasn't a girl, I wouldn't have to go through this pain of my period and endometriosis and polycystic ovaries, not the syndrome, but ovaries and all of these other things, you know, and emotional eating and all of these other things. And so when I was about 15 and a half, my mom finally, I was wearing leather jackets in 45 degree heat in Melbourne like that is intense. Yeah, I never want to take my jumper off and just trying to hide this body. Um, and my mum said, look, do you want a breast reduction? And a friend of hers who was also a psychologist had seen me at my granddad's funeral and just said, what's with the jacket on a 45 degree day. And my mum was like, oh, she loves that jacket. Like yeah, no mum. And the friend was like, no, Jan, it's the breasts. Like you've got to do something about that. And again, the power of manifesting. At the time I knew that Drew Barrymore had had a breast reduction at 16. So she'd become my idol. I was praying to something. I didn't even know what I was praying to. I didn't believe in a God, but I believed in the universe. I believed in mother earth, I believe in energy. And I was just like, please, please help me. Cause I was literally going to kill myself. Like that's how bad it got. And I couldn't lose weight. I felt really big in my body. I like, I, I couldn't run, I'd hit myself in the head with these ginormous breasts. Like it was just not okay. And my mum just said, do you want a breast reduction? I was like, oh my God. Yes. Finally, you've seen me. And, um, and that saved my life. And that's really where I started to be able to train. So my love of sport was born. Like I love going to the gym. I love lifting things. I love being strong like yourself. You know, I tried to kind of go into the full extreme of that. Like, I didn't have good balance or a good harmony with training. When I discovered it, I went really, really hard. And I also discovered at one point in time, Paleo. And that's where for the first time in my life, my sugar cravings came under control within the first two weeks of paleo. And I thought I had found the answer, but because my mentality and my head space was so sick from years of looking in the mirror and my eyes being broken in me with body dysmorphia, seeing myself as this really big kid who just wasn't desirable. I just thought I wasn't desirable. I wasn't pretty enough. I wasn't smart enough. I wasn't thin enough. I wasn't enough, yeah. And so, um, I took that to the extreme, like what you did. I, I went all the way down. Like I basically became anorexic. I was, I was so controlled in my eating. I trained every day, I stopped drinking. I stopped smoking. I stopped all those things. I was, uh, going back to school as a mature aged student and I dropped 20 kilos in three months. Like it was really unhealthy. You know, I looked scary. I had a big head and this tiny little body that was so wired, I was so wired and I was so miserable and I hated myself. And my mom still made comments like walking down the streets. Silly comments like, oh, look at her. She's so beautiful. And thin we'll never be like that will we? And I'm thinking I can't lose any more weight woman. Like I'm literally like starving here. And I, I, my brain didn't work properly. I was so anxious having panic attacks and trying to get through year 12. You know, it was really, really hard. And I knew at the end of it, it was all going to come undone. And it did. When I unraveled, I unraveled spectacularly, it was amazing. I just, everything fell apart and all the bingeing started. So I was a full blown bulimic by the age of 16, 17, trying and control my weight. Um, because I learned again during conditioning, that being overweight, wasn't desirable, and I was gonna do anything, it didn't matter if it was going to injure me to be thin. And even with the drug abuse as that, uh, kind of escalated into my later years, I discovered speed as my drug of choice, trying to, it gave me the illusion. It didn't really control my food. It just gave me the illusion it did. And, um, I felt so unhealthy and so on. Well, and in 2004, I went to rehab for the last time and got clean. And, uh, and promised myself then, you know, this is where I recommitted to totally healing and falling in love with myself. And so it's been a journey and, you know, I'm kind of, um, I feel good in my body now. I train four times a week. I've got a really good balance around that stuff. My body's a little bit injured from over-training in the past. So that's something I work with, but I've got a good support network around me now. I know. Especially the feminine, you know, and men as well. Like none of us can do this alone. We need a support network. I got a lot of, um, gold from. Uh, 12 step programs, but even then, you know, they kind of say that you can never recover. And I don't believe that that's true. I believe that recovery means that we recover ourselves and that is the whole complete loving, all encompassing version of ourselves where we are the light and the shadow. Yeah. And this is what I strive to become. More and more, every day, food is still something that I journey with every day. Some days are good. Some days are bad or not bad, but some days I, I struggle more than others. Um, every day I wake up and forgive myself for whatever has happened the day before. Every day, I practice rational recovery, which is understanding where these thoughts and feelings come from. It's that reptilian part of the brain, that lower brain, that's just sending old habitual signals to my adult brain, that sort of frontal lobe, which says go and binge now, you've done a good job today. You deserve it. It'll just be for today. Don't worry. You can stop tomorrow. And it's like, I know when I indulged that part, that it's not the true me, my healthy adult self in charge. And every time I do that, I'm giving a little bit of my power away, right. So every day I wake up, I forgive myself and then I get grateful for who and what I am. And over the years of doing this work and meeting these little parts of myself that I used to feel were unworthy and unlovable and calling them in actually having conversations with them. Yeah. And I say to them, you know, Hey, hi little, I don't know, 12 year old self. Cause she didn't like herself very much. Hey, my little 12 year old self. I see you. I acknowledge you. I respect you. And I love you. Do you know who I am? And very often they're like, no, who are you? And I'm like, I'm your 40 year old self, and they're like, get out of here. You're amazing. And I'm like, yeah, totally like fan girl, like they fan girl me because I am the ultimate version of who I would have looked up to when I was little. Right. But I just wanted to be this person. And if those parts of me get on board with who and what I am right now, and they're not opposing me, they're not, you know, resisting what I want. I say to them, I'm going to give you everything your heart ever decided only the way I ever could. It didn't matter about anybody else. You're going to work with me now. We're going to work together. Yeah. We're going to have fun. We're going to do this in our pleasure. We're going to feel powerful. We're going to feel like we're on each other's team. I don't want to do this alone. And that's why, Magic, I created the community of the platinum woman. Know your value, live your worth, because I didn't feel like I had a space where I could just go and be that person on the journey with other amazing, inspiring women who are ready to leave a legacy of light. You know, I know it's true. The women that we impact the world in the greatest way, you know, when sleeping women wake, mountains move. Mountains are the beautiful men, we're the ones having the babies, we're going to impact them when we are living it. We don't have to do anything other than just being it. Right. But we need a safe space to come and say I'm really struggling today. Right. I'm really struggling today and all of my stuff is coming up and I'm not being the best version of myself today. And I just need some way to be seen and to be held and to be loved by other sisters who were also groovers and movers and shakers that are like, really kind of dancing to the beat of their own drum, but rocking to the rhythm of community spirit. That's what I wanted a space that could, could be. For other women like me busy heart-centered women, the busy-ness is the head. The heart centeredness is the truth of who and what we truly are. And those two kind of fight with each other. They're at opposition and loggerheads. Right. And so if we can just say, look, we're all of it and it's okay to show up some days we are on fire and some days we are fully on purpose and we're passionate and other days, we're wobbly and we're vulnerable and we're just not that great feeling, you know, and that's okay. And there's somewhere we can go where we can be all of it and loved and all of that.

Magic Barclay: 34:16

I'm so glad you said and that's okay because we live a life of social media lives now where everything's got to be sunshine and flowers and happiness and big smiles. And geez, life is not like that. You have your ups and your downs and the waves. And it's really good to have, you know, a social media group where you can be raw and you can say, do you know what? Today's a really awful day. And I just need to shout out to my sisterhood, I don't want your sympathy. I don't want your pat on the back, but just want you to hear me. And it's a place where you can be heard, not necessarily have everyone solidifying the victim mentality of having a bad day.

Ella Hall: 35:05

That's so important that you said that because it's not about that. We were there to lift each other up, reflect our mastery and remind each other right now. Yeah. You felt what a spectacular, full well, who like you, what did you learn? How did you grow? What can you offer now with this new wisdom and insight to the rest of the collective, you wise, wise, woman, you. And that's the beauty, you know, all mastering something. Sometimes I've been the master of anxiety. I've been the master of depression, you know, and we watch. People that we love struggling with this, especially on the planet now, more than ever, you know, as you said, we do where we're like that comparison, that ego mind, that identity self that starts to look around and say, am I better than her? Or am I worse than her? Like, he's doing better than me. I should be over there by now. You know, it's judging and criticizing us all the time. That's the busy mind. That's the monkey mind, but we're not that. The truth of all and what we are is we are this beautiful, always alive, you know, it might get covered over, but it never disappears this beautiful creation, formation, energy, and living color and motion. And it's always there for us to tap into any time. We're always free to choose to choose again. Sometimes we just need beautiful reflections to say, Hey, remember who you are. You're amazing. Just as you are, whatever weight you are, however you look, whatever is happening, there but for the grace of God, go I, be grateful for the gifts that you have right now. You are here, you are special. You are meant to be here. You have a very unique gift to offer whether it's the wisdom of the journey of the darkness that you have overcome to be here. Now, that is your gift. If what a mastery, what an offering, how beautiful and delicious that I'm so privileged to be in your space to share that with you and celebrate you. That's what I wanted.

Magic Barclay: 36:56

Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. I just love your passion. It's just so infectious in a great way. Thank you, Ella. So your top two tips around reclaiming your body from weight. I'm not gonna say weight loss. I'm gonna say reclaiming your body because that feels more authentic today. So your top two tips today, are rational recovery, which you've discussed and tantra. And you've mentioned it a few times today. A lot of people think tantra, ooh, you know, it's a bit weird, it's a bit out there. Can you briefly explain what tantra is? And how it can affect the soul.

Ella Hall: 37:45

Yeah. A hundred percent. It doesn't just affect the soul. It affects all of those bodies at the same time, your physical, your mental, your emotional, and your energy, your spiritual body. And it brings them into alignment with just, little to no resistance, right? Um, the four core principles of tantra, I don't teach traditional tantra. My rebel inside me just doesn't like rules or regulations or being told this is good and this is bad. So I believe in following your bliss, following your pleasure. And this has been my greatest tool for falling back in love with my body, reconnecting to the parts of me that were previously disconnected or feeling numb or stuck or blocked. It really helped me around the food stuff because suddenly I could listen to the internal compass, right, of my body's wisdom. And, you know, like a lot of, um, dieticians and things will say, you know, just eat intuitively. Well, if your intuitive channel is blocked, how are you going to receive those messages and trust them? And tantra is your tool to reclaim yourself, your mind, your body, your energy, your spirit, your internal voice, that beautiful dialogue, the trust. It builds the muscle of trust with yourself. You're connecting beautifully and lovingly from a space of devotion. You start to see yourself as a sacred creature in your body, as this beautiful animal vessel that your soul resides in. Right? Um, so the four core principles are intention. And bringing presence to that intention. So when I'm present, I'm in my body. When I bring it intention, I now have a clear directive for my mind to follow. So now I'm using my mind in a really positive and productive way. It becomes the servant. Okay. And it's there to serve you. It wants to do good. It's always just looking to take us away from pain towards pleasure. So when you start to experience tantra as a means of channeling life force energy, And moving beautiful, loving, lush, clean, pristine energy through the body. It starts to awaken and activate all the areas that was once blocked and can start to just shift that trauma in that old stuck energy beautifully. In your pleasure, right? So we would bring intention and presence. That's the first key. Second is breath. When we're breathing, we come out of that sympathetic nervous system, which is what so many of you are talking about anxiety and getting in your head about food and all of these things. We're not going to get a clear message when we're stuck in that fight flight. food response, like that's survival mode. So some of us won't eat and others of us will just overeat from that sympathetic state. When we bring our breath into play, we enter a more parasympathetic nervous state. Suddenly everything starts to calm down. We can start to. Then bring in the other elements, which is sound, ah, when we make a sound oldest cells in our body vibrate at a greater, at a higher frequency because everything's energy in motion, right. Which is then going to help anything that was really heavy energy shift with more ease and more grace. And then we bring in movement. So we've got intention and presence, breath, sound, and movement. They are the four core principles or the four golden keys of tantra. And so when you're moving, I think in your body, you're not just stuck. You're not, you're not laying there like a starfish. You're actually, ah, your body's moving and undulating. Your you're allowing the energy to feel as it's moving through your body. It starts to move you. Yeah. And, and these things all start to it's that chain reaction I was talking about, about the flower blossoming. Yeah. A woman's positive pole of energy, like a plus sign of a battery is her heart. And that heart is the heart of her radiance. It's the heart of her soul. Yeah. They've done clinical studies now where it's the heart of your intuition? Yeah, go to HeartMath research academy and they'll they talk about it there, you know, it's the cohesion of the heart. So when a woman can connect to her heart and start to de-armor her heart and her womb and her sex, because she's breathing, she's moving, she's touching herself in her pleasure. She is going to have a deeper connection to herself, to her body. And she's going to feel better about it in general. So she's gonna want to put good things into it. Okay. As well as be shifting out the trauma and the heavy stuff. So already, what a beautiful place to live when we're living in that stuff. And I really want to say for any busy women listening out there going, I don't have time for that. That sounds like it's going to take heaps of time. And I have to like, you know, be orgasmic and everything like that. It doesn't matter where you start this journey wherever you start is perfect for you right here. Right now you could commit two minutes a day and literally hold your left hand over your heart space, your right hand over your base and breathe deeply in through the nose, into the belly for the count of four. Hold your breath for the count of full and let go out through the mouth and make some sound. Ah, For the count of four and notice what shifts you experienced from that alone. Okay. The other thing that I mentioned was rational recovery, and this is when we're busy women we're out and about, we start getting a thought, I'm going to go to the fridge. I'm going to eat all the food. And it's like, that's when we have that opportunity. To check in. So rational recovery was my first understanding of the brain itself. The rational understanding of these messages are not coming from my adult part, that frontal lobe of my brain they're coming from that fight flight center. That's saying survival mode, go and eat food, distract yourself from this thing you don't want to feel. Um, don't talk to that person to have that awkward conversation, go and eat food. Always what it was sending to me and not just eat a little bit of food, overeat, all the food. Right. And then I'd go into the compensator he behavior, which was for me, laxative abuse and purging. Right. And it was habitual. It was habitual after 26 years of that behavior, you know, it's deeply ingrained in the brain. So when I had that understanding, oh, okay. I'm not defective. I don't have a broken brain. I just have a brain that's got some neural pathways that are very well-worn from that reptilian center or that lower brain sending messages that come through into this higher brain self. And if I'm not discerning about, you know, questioning those messages, I just go and act. The beautiful thing was Magic, when I realized that that reptilian or lower brain in, in someone's nervous system that actually can send a message, but it can not make me move. It can not make me open the fridge door. It cannot put hand to mouth. It can not make me chew and swallow. That was freedom for me because then I had an opportunity to realize, where is this message coming from? Is it a real message? Am I actually hungry right now? Or is this just an old neural pathway? Well-worn that's just on autopilot. Right. And when I had that awareness, it was like, okay. I then had the opportunity to kind of just watch those messages come through and like watching ocean waves, you don't try and fight the wave. You don't try and like bargain with the wave. Come on, just this once. Like you do that and you've already lost, right. You just watch the wave and you allow it to be there and you focus on the next best and most obvious thing that will take you to what you do. Not to what you don't want. Right. And then all of a sudden, after a while those messages get a little bit less, a little bit less, as I said, I still have my days that I really struggle. I'm learning. I am a student of life. I'm a curious Explorer. I forgive myself and I'm grateful for everything in every way. Right. And some days, yeah, I feel really powerful. And, and other days I feel wobbly and all of it is welcome.

Magic Barclay: 45:52

That is fantastic to hear. And thank you so much for sharing all of that amazing wisdom with us. We like to give freebies away here, and I know that you've got the platinum women groups, so people can jump into there because you're always giving content in there. And that's on Facebook at facebook.com/groups/the platinum woman. We can also find you on Facebook at Ella hall, manifesting coach. You're on Instagram at Ella hall coach. And your website is www dot Ella Hall, coach.com. Thank you again for sharing all of this. I really do urge women to jump into the platinum woman group and really. Delve through and see what resonates with you. What can support you? It's a fantastic group to be part of. And as I said, there's lots of content in there, but for the men listening, what can the men grab as a freebie from you and where can they find it?

Ella Hall: 47:01

A hundred percent. So for the men and for the women, I have another site as well, which is dedicated to tantra. It's www dot. Tantra ella.com. And if you go there, you can simply sign up to my mailing list. Um, and you'll receive the seven golden keys of tantra checklist and also fabulous orgasms for women written by my mother, Dr. Janet Hall. I think it's actually a MP3. So you can get that content right now and have a look at all my offerings there. And I can't wait to journey with each and everyone who resonates with this message at the ideal time for you.

Magic Barclay: 47:40

Thank you so much listeners for joining us for episode 65, the power of pleasure with Ella Hall. Before you go forth and create your magical life, I urge you to listen out for episode 66, our listener question, which is how to confront and move through fears safely and healthfully. Again, thank you Ella. For joining us in episode 65. Listeners go forth and create your magical life.

Ella Hall: 48:08

Thank you so much for having me magic. Big love.